So Gollum didn’t die on March 25,
3019 (Third Age), he didn’t die at all:
old Sméagol lives on another stage
where he still prances (or crawls) with
the same sage skills; Slinker, or Stinker,
as you may have known him, fills the
Brisbane Lord Mayor’s robes these days.
‘Twas a strange quirk of fate, a political
fait accompli where a destitute minority was
elected – and survived, per chance, to
wriggle free of the unworkable impasse
because, hear this, he once possessed
The Ring! In the glow of his surety and
those wide, staring eyes he brazenly sings.
Campbell Newman was an Army Engineer,
god willing, a moderate given to Howard’s
brand of conservatism, born into politics
with both parents being liberal politicians.
He majored in the big league as a councillor
in 2004, a Johnny-come-lately without a score
to his name. But hey, look at him now!
Duplicity and sleight of hand are skills
worthy of leadership respect in this land of lost
opportunity. And Gollum clears his throat with
consummate ease as he hawks and drools
the gobbets of hobbit wisdom he uses to
sustain his reign. Bless Sméagol, the eager to
please – curse Gollum and his Mayor’s chain.
© 19 March 2007, I.D. Carswell
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