Therefore Guilty End To End

Here’s a case for you to cogitate; imagine,
you are drunk – that’s over 0.05% BAC
in this tipsy State and a good Samaritan.
Your sister’s car has died, battery expired.
Like any brother would I guess, you feel
obliged to volunteer and fix it for the lass.

Aha, your first mistake. You don’t need the
keys, just a battery but her sorry car resides
besides the road. You’re busy fixing things.
A canny cop stops to be a kindly bloke – at
best a bloody pest, and says, you’ve had a
few, I think, I’ll have to nick you for the drink.

You expostulate, Hey – but! Too late, you’re
nicked and charged. No time to blink. The test
suggests you’re far too drunk to drive; you may
have said you couldn’t anyway – look, no keys!
Protesting proves you might have done, sorry
son, at least that’s what the copper says!

Is this then a travesty, a joke upon humanity or
just a turd? The case was heard, appealed and
won by Queensland Cops when Law regressed;
the Judge’s view suggests – if near a car, vicinity
allowed and pissed but likely to intend to drive,
you’re therefore guilty end to end.
© 28 December 2007, I. D. Carswell