Tubbing

 

Tubbed me old mate ‘Podge’ this arv,
wasn’t too fussed but for standing up
with paws on rim like he’s the one in
charge; seriously, in JRT lingo bath’s
a deviant, dirty word with fantasies –
so we called it a shower, no way’s he
ever being bathed – so ‘a sensuous’
massage ensued with lots of froth

He’ll cop the worst of a wash with a
veteran’s sang-froid can he escape
to roll luxuriously in crap soon as it’s
done – but not today; he had been
hoodwinked clean by a mate who
carefully planned his incarceration

So he’s cooped up in the guest room
listening to radio with doors secure
for an hour or more – then we’ll see
whether he’ll stoop into conformity
with a view deeming ‘clean’ dogs
don’t need smell of chicken poop
© 23 April 2013, I. D. Carswell